Rice Flakes Vegan Blondies

WARNING:  DO NOT MAKE THIS RECIPE!  Yes, I TOTALLY mean it!!!

Wow, there are so many cool blogs out there…   The Gluten Free Goddess blog is one of them.  These blondies are inspired by her Quinoa Breakfast Brownies.  But please, by all means just head to her glorious website and make HER recipe – skip this one…

Vitamin cottage was out of quinoa flakes, so I decided to try it with rice flakes.   BIG MISTAKE!!!  And… as usual, I ended up changing the recipe even more… That works most of the time, but hey we all get off days…

Now, let me tell you that rice flakes are VERY tricky…  they are not like quinoa flakes, nor like oats… They are just like thin pieces of really hard nails that had just been removed from fresh dead bodies – or something like that… They NEED to be soaked before using them for baking.  Though, take my advice and just get quinoa flakes…

This attempt to make the recipe with rice flakes instead of quinoa actually tasted pretty ok, but… you could totally feel some kind of extra “funny” crunchiness… It was just like if you had been clipping your nails while baking and got a bunch (a ton) of nail pieces in your dough…

Yeah, gross!!!!  It is a pretty nasty comparison, but trust me, as accurate as it gets…  You will understand if you have ever bitten your nails…

So, here (another cool blog!) I found some advice on what to do to make the rice flakes work 🙂

Now, here is what you have been waiting for… That recipe you will never want to make!  Yay!!!!

WARNING #2 DO NOT MAKE THIS RECIPE!!!  Instead, just go to a foodie blog you like…

Rice Flakes Vegan Blondies

  • ½  cup rice flakes (for the love of God, please skip this step!!!)
  • ½  cup light coconut milk
  • ½  cup buckwheat flour
  • ¼ cup Millet flour
  • ¼  cup cornstarch
  • ½  tsp. xantan gum
  • ½  tsp sea salt
  • ½  tsp baking soda
  • ¾   tsp baking powder
  • 1/8 + 2 Tbs  cup coconut sugar
  • 1/8 + 2 Tbs cup date sugar
  • ¼ + 1/8  cup natural brown sugar
  • 1/3  cup avocado oil
  • ½  tsp pure vanilla extract
  • ¼  cup chopped walnuts
  • ½  tbsp ener-g type egg replacer
  • 2 tbsps water

Soak rice flakes on light coconut milk for about 30 minutes (I tried for a bit less time and it DID NOT go well! Maybe 10 hours would be more accurate…).

Mix well all dry ingredients, except egg replacer powder and walnuts. After mixing dry ingredients, add chopped walnuts.

Mix oil with vanilla extract.   In another container mix egg replacer powder and water until pretty well dissolved.

Combine all wet ingredients and add to dry ingredients mixture.

Add soaked rice flakes to mixture (you might NOT want to do that…just put them in the trash…).

Mix well with a fork.  Cover with parchment paper a 8x8x2 baking pan.

Hmmm… I forgot to write down for how long I baked them for…  But, who cares as you are not going to make this recipe.  Really, please don’t.

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s